Things happened for a reason….so passé, yet it’s turning out to be a universal truth.
It’s not everyday I get to make some effort to be a little closer to someone I really like. Something’s always holding me back whenever I plan to do so. It is possible that I’m lacking some courage, guts or perhaps confidence, yet whatever it is, I know it’s not going to turn into something I carefully plan about.
He is not that ideal, but he’s the one who made my heart consistently beat really fast…after a gazillion years!! He’s not great looking, yet he looks perfect on his rusty jeans on, rock start printed shirt, rasta looking bonnet, armed with the sweetest smile I’ve ever seen…..after a gazillion years again! He have this ultimate power leaving me speechless every time he pass by or simply glance at my direction --- NOW I’M BEING MUSHY!!!! See he got me speechless and mushy at the same time....it’s so impossible for me to be like that, but he made it possible.
I never realized how important the day we became acquaintance until I understand what all this mushiness I’m going through is. Now, we’re just one perfect strangers; nothing left but the memories where he always smile back at me.
I don’t know what I’ve done or probably my stupid mouth did it again that’s why things turned this way. It may be something stupid that I have had done that will always remind him every time he see me. Whatever it is, It’s me. It took me time to accept it. It crashes my ability to like who I am. My friend may be right, I better blindfold myself whenever I’m going to face a mirror, because what all I’m going to see is one unpleasing and very disappointing lass.
It made me feel sad for a few hours yet I realized one thing, this may sound stupid, but all this didn’t really break my heart, it was all replaced by irreplaceable disappointments. I’m more disappointed at him than I am to myself. There are several things he has done that melt my mushiness and simply throw at the trash. All that’s left of me are series of "why" questions, unfathomable disenchantments and the courage to move on, not taking a fleeting looks at his direction.
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
Monday, August 17, 2009
Stream to scream??
It was saturday morning that i have to go to the office to meet my agents for a huddle when i heard a shocking and interesting news --- Stream Global contact center merge with Etelecare GS.
I guess I was the one who's updated instead of me updating agents on what to do with their calls.
I watched the agents' reactions when their Team Leader was carefully breaking the the news and seems like preparing himself for more violent reactions, but lo and behold, all they did was give a sigh of disappointment, grin and most of them have no reactions at all!
In general most of the agents around me are worried. There are so many "what if" questions going around and a very complex "what-will-happend-to-us?" look in the face. It's the same case here on the support department. Numerous rumors are going around and it is somehow making us think of ourselves and for some, their growth in this industry.
Personally, I am disappointed. The fact that Etelecare can no longer stand on its own means something really big. I was once not that proud working on a BPO industry not until i've experience the Etelecare culture and their drive to make a mark world wide. I must admit that right now i'm not that fully happy with my work, what more now that a lot of changes are going on and it's getting worst than i can think of. I'm not saying that Stream is a bad company or anything like that, I don't know anything about them so I can't really say anything good or bad about them. What I care for (for whatever reason) is the company i'm in right now.
Will they increase our pay? Is that one of the reason why we'll no longer have our PA? Does that mean that new hires get to have more pay thatn those whose working here like the entire of their lives? Where have all our good and great boss gone? Why most of them left us? Is it that worst that you need to consider other company and leave us hanging? Will it be more hard for us to get promoted? What's the next step??
All i know...we just have to expect the worst and hope for the best.
I want to blame it on global recession and we are directly affected by that. Yet there's nothing I can do but be thankful because I still have a job to keep.
The only thing all of us have is the hope that Stream will not have a bad effects on Etelecare or vice versa. We hope that nothing really big will be compromised by this decision.
Cross our fingers!Ü
I guess I was the one who's updated instead of me updating agents on what to do with their calls.
I watched the agents' reactions when their Team Leader was carefully breaking the the news and seems like preparing himself for more violent reactions, but lo and behold, all they did was give a sigh of disappointment, grin and most of them have no reactions at all!
In general most of the agents around me are worried. There are so many "what if" questions going around and a very complex "what-will-happend-to-us?" look in the face. It's the same case here on the support department. Numerous rumors are going around and it is somehow making us think of ourselves and for some, their growth in this industry.
Personally, I am disappointed. The fact that Etelecare can no longer stand on its own means something really big. I was once not that proud working on a BPO industry not until i've experience the Etelecare culture and their drive to make a mark world wide. I must admit that right now i'm not that fully happy with my work, what more now that a lot of changes are going on and it's getting worst than i can think of. I'm not saying that Stream is a bad company or anything like that, I don't know anything about them so I can't really say anything good or bad about them. What I care for (for whatever reason) is the company i'm in right now.
Will they increase our pay? Is that one of the reason why we'll no longer have our PA? Does that mean that new hires get to have more pay thatn those whose working here like the entire of their lives? Where have all our good and great boss gone? Why most of them left us? Is it that worst that you need to consider other company and leave us hanging? Will it be more hard for us to get promoted? What's the next step??
All i know...we just have to expect the worst and hope for the best.
I want to blame it on global recession and we are directly affected by that. Yet there's nothing I can do but be thankful because I still have a job to keep.
The only thing all of us have is the hope that Stream will not have a bad effects on Etelecare or vice versa. We hope that nothing really big will be compromised by this decision.
Cross our fingers!Ü
Friday, August 7, 2009
Where have all my ideas gone?
It’s been almost a month since I get to put into words all the thoughts and ideas that successfully intervene in my life and I think there’s no one to blame but my great ways in procrastinating.
It’s the culprit, the robber, the one I should put all the blames on.
I procrastinate that’s why I don’t get to love my job and didn’t get to find a career.
I procrastinate that’s why I’m still single.
I procrastinate that’s why I don’t really get to appreciate every single time I have.
I procrastinate as an alternative way for me if I can’t stop from what I’m doing to write down what I have in mind and heart.
Above all, I blame myself for doing it. Or maybe I should blame myself for not doing something about it. Procrastinating is eating my senses. I allow that to happen so I’m suffering the consequences. It’s me who can’t be brave enough to make a step forward and take the risk to defeat procrastinating. I let it take control MY steering wheel.
Time was wasted and there’s nothing I can do to get back on something that’s lost. I think the best thing to do is, oh well, as much as possible, don’t allow procrastinating to take over me. How? I don’t know. I think I should start doing what matters most – putting my thoughts into words, WRITE! I will try my best not to drag my feet when something came up and will not be hesitant to take time on putting into writing whatever it is that will just hit me. Writing is the only thing I get to do where I put my heart in and I know, It’s unfair for myself if I will take it for granted.
It’s the culprit, the robber, the one I should put all the blames on.
I procrastinate that’s why I don’t get to love my job and didn’t get to find a career.
I procrastinate that’s why I’m still single.
I procrastinate that’s why I don’t really get to appreciate every single time I have.
I procrastinate as an alternative way for me if I can’t stop from what I’m doing to write down what I have in mind and heart.
Above all, I blame myself for doing it. Or maybe I should blame myself for not doing something about it. Procrastinating is eating my senses. I allow that to happen so I’m suffering the consequences. It’s me who can’t be brave enough to make a step forward and take the risk to defeat procrastinating. I let it take control MY steering wheel.
Time was wasted and there’s nothing I can do to get back on something that’s lost. I think the best thing to do is, oh well, as much as possible, don’t allow procrastinating to take over me. How? I don’t know. I think I should start doing what matters most – putting my thoughts into words, WRITE! I will try my best not to drag my feet when something came up and will not be hesitant to take time on putting into writing whatever it is that will just hit me. Writing is the only thing I get to do where I put my heart in and I know, It’s unfair for myself if I will take it for granted.
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Dreamer's list
Changes took place and it shook my comfort zone.
This is just one of those boring days i have to face, for me to earn a little cash and must admit, i know that it will take me some time to cope with the situation. Since killing time has been my hobby for the past few days, there's a lot of things going on my mind. Bad and good but never naughty..sweet and sometimes that i have to snap back to reality and face the real deal.
I just came out with the list i usually think of and questions in my mind i try to answer on my own.
1. What would I be like if I'm working on an advertising firm?
2. Me working on a photoshoot as a photographer on a popular magazine...like nat geo..hehehe
3. I'm part of a band..playing drums or lead guitar.
4. What if me and "shaider" are together...and his wife find out about it?!?!
5. I'm driving my own customized Eclipse.
6. Directing my own Indie Film.
7. Someone singing "Hard to Believe" (Eheads) for me.
8. Me singing "I Miss You" (incubus) to someone.
9. I'm undergoing to a MAJOR make-over.
10. Designing my own house.
11. If I am to manage a business what would it be??
12. Kicking one of the boss's ass.
13. Repramand the agent I'm rating
oh well..here are just some on my list....
as much as i want to elaborate more about this, it will take some more time for me to do so. Each of them have thier own story and most of them doesn't have an ending yet. Oh well.. guess day dreaming is something most people do when they are usually stuck on a traffic.Ü
This is just one of those boring days i have to face, for me to earn a little cash and must admit, i know that it will take me some time to cope with the situation. Since killing time has been my hobby for the past few days, there's a lot of things going on my mind. Bad and good but never naughty..sweet and sometimes that i have to snap back to reality and face the real deal.
I just came out with the list i usually think of and questions in my mind i try to answer on my own.
1. What would I be like if I'm working on an advertising firm?
2. Me working on a photoshoot as a photographer on a popular magazine...like nat geo..hehehe
3. I'm part of a band..playing drums or lead guitar.
4. What if me and "shaider" are together...and his wife find out about it?!?!
5. I'm driving my own customized Eclipse.
6. Directing my own Indie Film.
7. Someone singing "Hard to Believe" (Eheads) for me.
8. Me singing "I Miss You" (incubus) to someone.
9. I'm undergoing to a MAJOR make-over.
10. Designing my own house.
11. If I am to manage a business what would it be??
12. Kicking one of the boss's ass.
13. Repramand the agent I'm rating
oh well..here are just some on my list....
as much as i want to elaborate more about this, it will take some more time for me to do so. Each of them have thier own story and most of them doesn't have an ending yet. Oh well.. guess day dreaming is something most people do when they are usually stuck on a traffic.Ü
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Living a Happy Ending (??)
I do hope that life is as easy as finding something that will make you happy and deciding to live with it and a happily ever after story goes on.
Life is not really a fairy tale story that we used to read and dreamed of when we're still young.OH c'mon! i know you learned about that the day your first love broke your heart! Prince charmings don't just come your way, rescue you from distress and sweep you off your feet. Fact is, you have to wait or find for the right one and worst is chase someone you know will never love you in return.
Castles isn't as good as what Disney Land have. It wasn't extravagant, dancing, singing, and laying your head on the sand while watching the stars dance the night away; i guess that's why you have to pay for entrance fee if you want to experience a fairy tale like life. snap snap!! Life is NOT just like that.
I guess what most of the details i missed are the adventures of the characters for them to reach their happy ending.
It's no fun to be poisoned by your stepmother...it's not fun to be poisoned by anybody! It's not fun to lose a pretty glass shoe, to get lost in the woods, to kiss a frog, to be treated badly by your stepsisters, or for someone to attempt stabbing you at your back.
It's true that life isn't a fairy tale story because I don't live my life in fantasies every single day. Yet i know i can have my own happy endings, i will find my prince, it doesn't really matter if i get to live in a castle or a cottage as long as my crib is filled with love and hope. Those were just the things I think that will make me happy.
I cry, someone out there wishing me badluck but a lot of my friends are sharing all the luck they can get with me the same way i do with them, i once kisssed a frog but i turned into a frog instead of him turning into my Prince,i got lost not just in the woods but in the jungle(and still getting lost) and my adventures are more fun than what Cinderella and the rest of the princesses have. I guess i am no VIP when it comes to
facing trials in life!
See it's just a twist of fate....and in reality all "happy endings" takes a lot of effort...and even that effort will not be enough to make some people live with it and be contented. Life have a very tricky way of playing games with us! I guess you'll know you won the game if one found whatever it is that will make that person happy and decided to live with it happily ever after...
You think you found your happiness?
Life is not really a fairy tale story that we used to read and dreamed of when we're still young.OH c'mon! i know you learned about that the day your first love broke your heart! Prince charmings don't just come your way, rescue you from distress and sweep you off your feet. Fact is, you have to wait or find for the right one and worst is chase someone you know will never love you in return.
Castles isn't as good as what Disney Land have. It wasn't extravagant, dancing, singing, and laying your head on the sand while watching the stars dance the night away; i guess that's why you have to pay for entrance fee if you want to experience a fairy tale like life. snap snap!! Life is NOT just like that.
I guess what most of the details i missed are the adventures of the characters for them to reach their happy ending.
It's no fun to be poisoned by your stepmother...it's not fun to be poisoned by anybody! It's not fun to lose a pretty glass shoe, to get lost in the woods, to kiss a frog, to be treated badly by your stepsisters, or for someone to attempt stabbing you at your back.
It's true that life isn't a fairy tale story because I don't live my life in fantasies every single day. Yet i know i can have my own happy endings, i will find my prince, it doesn't really matter if i get to live in a castle or a cottage as long as my crib is filled with love and hope. Those were just the things I think that will make me happy.
I cry, someone out there wishing me badluck but a lot of my friends are sharing all the luck they can get with me the same way i do with them, i once kisssed a frog but i turned into a frog instead of him turning into my Prince,i got lost not just in the woods but in the jungle(and still getting lost) and my adventures are more fun than what Cinderella and the rest of the princesses have. I guess i am no VIP when it comes to
facing trials in life!
See it's just a twist of fate....and in reality all "happy endings" takes a lot of effort...and even that effort will not be enough to make some people live with it and be contented. Life have a very tricky way of playing games with us! I guess you'll know you won the game if one found whatever it is that will make that person happy and decided to live with it happily ever after...
You think you found your happiness?
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Captain Who?!?!
Sino nga ba si Kapitan Sino?
Kapitan ano??!!
Mali! Kapitan Sino!!
Oh eh sino nga si Kapitan Watever?!?!
...hindi siya isang malaking joke,pero ang buhay niya parang isang malaking joke lang ang lahat. Siya ang bida na fictional character sa pang-7 libro ni bob Ong, na tulad ng buhay mo at buhay ko, posibleng wala ring happy ending. Posibleng meron, but one thing is for sure, tulad ng buhay niya, malamang din sa mga oras na to, jino-joke ka lang ng fate mo.
Oh eh sino nga si Kapitan Chorva???
Naintriga ako nung sabihin sa'kin ng pamangkin ko ang bagong book na toh. It's about a super hero na may usual discovery ng super power ability and the story goes on. So what makes it unsual compared sa biography ni Superman, Batman, Spiderman at Bioman??
Si Kapitan Sino, may side-kick na walang kwenta pero the best. The besk kasi simple lang sing tao; malakas mang-asar, mahilig makipag phone-pal,nagsasabi lagi ng totoo kahit nakakayamot na, at sumusuporta sa kaibigan hanggang kulungan!
Ang leading lady ni Kapitan Sino, hindi yung super sexy at damsel in distress ang drama, d tulad ng mga ibang leading lady ng mga super hero jan. Siguro ang masaklap din dun, hindi man lang nia na-kiss yung girl nia kahit sa cheeks man lang!
Hindi ulila sa magulang si Kapitan Sino, hindi inabuso ng kamag-anak, hindi sumikat kahit iligtas pa niya ang buong Pelaez, at siya lang ang super hero na ibinintang ang pagkamatay ng kapitbahay dahil sa lung cancer.
Mukha siyang tanga sa costume niya pero ok lang.
Feeling ko wala siang abs, hindi siya drop dead gorgeous kasi nga isa siyang malaking tanga sa costume/disguise niya! Pero ok lang sa kanya!! cute noh?!
Masasabi kong makulet siya, mabait ng kaibigan, masipag, mahal ang trabaho niya, mapagmahal at mabait na anak, at higit sa lahatresposableng mamamayan! reactive masyado...OA minsan, pero nagampanan niya ang papel niya sa lipunan ayon sa kanyang kakayahan.
EH SINO NGA SI KAPITAN SINO?!?!
Siya ay pwedeng ikaw, ako o yung mukhang loser/tanga/nerd/sa-friendster-lang-may-friends na katabi mo! Sinasalamin niya ang mga twenty somthing na tao na hinaharap ang quarterlife crisis, teenager na feeling niya kaya niyang gawin ang lahat, isang idealist na akala niya mababago niya ang mundo; nalulungkot, tumatawa, naiinlove, nagiging masaya, nadidisappoint, kwela, frustrated, makata, nasasaktan at ang hangad lang ay kabutihan para sa mga taong-bayan.
Tulad natin, si Kapitan Sino ay may love-hate relationship sa life; iisa lang ang kakahantungan...super hero siya hindi immortal.
Ganyan ang pagkakakilala ko kay Kapitan Sino...
Kapitan ano??!!
Mali! Kapitan Sino!!
Oh eh sino nga si Kapitan Watever?!?!
...hindi siya isang malaking joke,pero ang buhay niya parang isang malaking joke lang ang lahat. Siya ang bida na fictional character sa pang-7 libro ni bob Ong, na tulad ng buhay mo at buhay ko, posibleng wala ring happy ending. Posibleng meron, but one thing is for sure, tulad ng buhay niya, malamang din sa mga oras na to, jino-joke ka lang ng fate mo.
Oh eh sino nga si Kapitan Chorva???
Naintriga ako nung sabihin sa'kin ng pamangkin ko ang bagong book na toh. It's about a super hero na may usual discovery ng super power ability and the story goes on. So what makes it unsual compared sa biography ni Superman, Batman, Spiderman at Bioman??
Si Kapitan Sino, may side-kick na walang kwenta pero the best. The besk kasi simple lang sing tao; malakas mang-asar, mahilig makipag phone-pal,nagsasabi lagi ng totoo kahit nakakayamot na, at sumusuporta sa kaibigan hanggang kulungan!
Ang leading lady ni Kapitan Sino, hindi yung super sexy at damsel in distress ang drama, d tulad ng mga ibang leading lady ng mga super hero jan. Siguro ang masaklap din dun, hindi man lang nia na-kiss yung girl nia kahit sa cheeks man lang!
Hindi ulila sa magulang si Kapitan Sino, hindi inabuso ng kamag-anak, hindi sumikat kahit iligtas pa niya ang buong Pelaez, at siya lang ang super hero na ibinintang ang pagkamatay ng kapitbahay dahil sa lung cancer.
Mukha siyang tanga sa costume niya pero ok lang.
Feeling ko wala siang abs, hindi siya drop dead gorgeous kasi nga isa siyang malaking tanga sa costume/disguise niya! Pero ok lang sa kanya!! cute noh?!
Masasabi kong makulet siya, mabait ng kaibigan, masipag, mahal ang trabaho niya, mapagmahal at mabait na anak, at higit sa lahatresposableng mamamayan! reactive masyado...OA minsan, pero nagampanan niya ang papel niya sa lipunan ayon sa kanyang kakayahan.
EH SINO NGA SI KAPITAN SINO?!?!
Siya ay pwedeng ikaw, ako o yung mukhang loser/tanga/nerd/sa-friendster-lang-may-friends na katabi mo! Sinasalamin niya ang mga twenty somthing na tao na hinaharap ang quarterlife crisis, teenager na feeling niya kaya niyang gawin ang lahat, isang idealist na akala niya mababago niya ang mundo; nalulungkot, tumatawa, naiinlove, nagiging masaya, nadidisappoint, kwela, frustrated, makata, nasasaktan at ang hangad lang ay kabutihan para sa mga taong-bayan.
Tulad natin, si Kapitan Sino ay may love-hate relationship sa life; iisa lang ang kakahantungan...super hero siya hindi immortal.
Ganyan ang pagkakakilala ko kay Kapitan Sino...
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
La Mode
One of the changes i'm looking forward this year is my ultimate make-over!
Through these years i keep on sticking to my (oh so beloved) chucks, jeans ans shirt outfit., and now, i just figured out that i have to explore more when it comes to fashin and be a lil' adventurous when it comes to dressing up. Well, it doesn't really mean i have to wear something really wacky outfit, i just have to get used in wearing dresses, corporate attires and high heeled shoes that will somehow bring out the sassy yet sofisticated (naks!) part of me at the same time feeling comfortable on what i'm wearing.
I know this is going to be something and i'm pretty excited about it. I really don't care right now what some people will say about the changes i'll make for myself, but i have to listen though and somehow evaluate myself too...maybe what i'm wearing for the day might be tooo flashy or something.hehehe
I know this is the time i'll find Cosmopolitan and Elle mag will be really a big help for me!Ü
Through these years i keep on sticking to my (oh so beloved) chucks, jeans ans shirt outfit., and now, i just figured out that i have to explore more when it comes to fashin and be a lil' adventurous when it comes to dressing up. Well, it doesn't really mean i have to wear something really wacky outfit, i just have to get used in wearing dresses, corporate attires and high heeled shoes that will somehow bring out the sassy yet sofisticated (naks!) part of me at the same time feeling comfortable on what i'm wearing.
I know this is going to be something and i'm pretty excited about it. I really don't care right now what some people will say about the changes i'll make for myself, but i have to listen though and somehow evaluate myself too...maybe what i'm wearing for the day might be tooo flashy or something.hehehe
I know this is the time i'll find Cosmopolitan and Elle mag will be really a big help for me!Ü
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