Lonesome tonight?

Loneliness is always been everybody’s (one of) main personal issue. Being in a relationship tends to measure ones hotness, appeal to opposite sex, self confidence and social values, whether that be in a good or complicated relationship.

Nowadays, they say being single is a sign that someone knows what he or she wants and how to get it, it’s a sign that single people don’t settle for something less and knows they deserve something worth the wait, it could also mean that single people have more time to enjoy life more than those in a relationship. Well for me, I find this a lie!

Some opted to be single because they simply having fun not being tied to somebody, and enjoys having "fling" with someone….to mind you, "fling" is a relationship, also known as being friends with benefits with someone. Still, single people dating anybody they like or want for that matter, is unaware that they are starting to build relationship with someone; they are not just tied to them like those who have a serious relationship with. They have freedom to choose, and that freedom makes it different from other relationships some have. For some, they even consider themselves to be in a "complicated" relationship. Sorry, but for me people who are engaged to this set-up are more likely insecure of themselves or could be taking revenge on bad past they have. They don’t get tired playing around simply because they always find flaws, either on themselves or the person they are seeing. This statement only goes for players out there, stating they are single while making other weep without being aware of it. Again, singles who are love to mingle and flirt around with anybody they like are players.

Some people are love chasers. They are those who are the "players" victim. They are single because they think, all the person so go out with or met, don’t like them. They are those who often think "I may not be the right one for you, but someone is out there who will love me back!". They are pretty strong and never get tired on seeking the right one. They are those who are "pretty close on finding the right one", but still end their nights alone.

Hopeless romantics are often single too. They are the ones always waiting for someone who will make them whole, who will help them find the value of themselves and will make them see stars and fireworks every time they go out with someone. No sparks means no love for them. They rely more on happy endings (which by the way, ever lasting love only works if both couple are dead and spending time in heaven), prince charmings and beautiful princesses. Hopeless romantics always end up with the wrong one, like those Love chasers…and often ask themselves "why?". Then again both of them have in common, they are this close on meeting the right one for them…they only have to waste time with the wrong ones.

And there are some singles that just enjoy the life they live in! They go out with their friends, consider dates as a "bonus" on their weekend schedule, appreciate their family more because they spend more time with them and of course, starting to love themselves simply because they know they will find the good one for them (take note: not the right one) and they know for themselves that they can spend time with the wrong ones, but not really waste their time for them. They have more life than the players, love chasers and hopeless romantic have. Then again, they end up alone, maybe because they enjoy their own life so much, they unaware that they are not letting someone take a peek on their adventurous, often busy life! Worst is, they still feel alone, for they have been single for eons!

So what really makes someone feel less lonesome? The key is, loneliness don’t rely on someone’s affection alone. If you are to tell me I’m wrong…think how many divorce or annulments are being process by lawyers every single day? How many couples are wasting money for couples’ therapy? Not to mention all couples separating without any professional help. Point is, being single does make someone feel alone, but it’s only a matter of having a balance life so single person won’t feel lonely at all.

People should shrug off the idea that lonesome gauges someone’s weight, number of friends or sex appeal. It’s a matter of learning how to love, be loved and finding love without doing any desperate moves. It’s learning self acceptance and appreciating life. Someone status is an option…so does loneliness.